About an Angel

I've intended to write about him since a year and a half... But never really got to it. The urge was strong at moments... but probably blogging was not feasible at those times... And when it was, I did not feel the urge that strongly. Hence I did not write because I felt I may not do justice to him.

I will carry on the tradition of not naming people on this public blog, but for those who know, he's a dear brother to me since more than two years... since 21st November, 2004 to be precise. Since then he has been a very strong influence in my life... which I will try to illustrate below. And to my joy, this angel is best friends with HIM ;)... He's a gem whom we as a couple have always treasured very closely.

The first thing you'll notice about him is his eyes... God they're so huge!! And they'll observe everything about you and for me, they speak his heart out silently. Not in words, but through his eyes he has always enveloped me in a warm, affectionate cocoon everytime he looked at me.

When we got close first, I felt this guy will never be emotional. This was because he was impossibly practical all the time! He never uttered a word without an irrefutable logic to it. What fascinated me to mindlessness was his thinking system. He is my definition of "clarity of thought". And I've exploited that quality of his to no extent :D... As usual I put myself in a soup and go crying to him. All I have to do is state all the facts and he'll come up with a simple, yet brilliant solution. He'll put things in a much clearer and brighter perspective so that I wouldn't feel so bad about whatever happened :) ...

And then I discovered the emotional aspect in him... And it made my soul cry out to him. I don't think anyone can love the way he does. He will not say words, or express in conventional ways... but he will love like nobody's business! Unconditional, unwavering and so strong that you'll feel it almost tangibly. He doesn't expect anything in return... Cherub, I hail you for that and am very very grateful for the way you are.

Ok this is directly to you, angel. I'm writing this blog for several reasons. One of course is to express how important you are in my life... And will always be. You influence me effortlessly... which does not happen with me with many people. Every single opinion of yours is like God's wish for me. I trust your instincts and am willing to take your advices blindly. I know that you're not torn in your mind like we others are by human complexities... And hence whatever you say is pure, simple, beautiful... And I love you so much for that simplicity :) ...

The other reason is... my guilt. I know I have never given you what you deserve. You deserve so much love and attention and I've often taken you for granted :( .. I want you to know that I realize this... And am extremely, terribly sorry for the way I've been. You've never complained and I've always wondered how you can be so forgiving. But please don't ever think that my adoration for you is unreal. I respect you like no other and really look up to you... and look forward to your presence in every step of my life. Your presence in the same city, insanely, inexplicably, puts me so much at ease...

I dedicate this entry to you because I wanted to do something really special. You know like writing "Thank You" on the sky or something :)... Maybe I will do something better than this someday... Please be around!!

- She

PS - One confession to you... tum jab "oye bandar" karke daant shuru karte ho na apni... Life seems mast :) ...